* Bad or corrupt header, go get a haircut * Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner * If it weren't for C, we'd all be programming in BASI and OBO Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again * We are sorry, but the number you have dialed is imaginary. * boast = blogging is open & amiable sharing of thoughts * Everytime i time i touch my code, i give birth to ten new bugs * Squash one bug, you'll see ten new bugs popping * The beginning of the programmer's wisdom is understanding the difference between getting program to run and having a runnable program * LISP = Lots of Irritating Silly Parentheses * Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. * COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key * If you want a language that tries to lock up all the sharp objects and fire-making implements, use Pascal or Ada: the Nerf languages, harmless fun for children of all ages, and they won't mar the furniture
* The difference between e-mail and regular mail is that computers handle e-mail, and computers never decide to come to work one day and shoot all the other computers * Beware of programmers that carry screwdrivers * The farther south you go, the more dollar stores there are * Be nice to the nerds, for all you know they might be the next Bill Gates! * Concept: On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape button * There is only one satisfying way to boot a computer * You know it's love when you memorize her IP number to skip DNS overhead * Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny * UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity * The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong * A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila * Unix, DOS and Windows.the good, the bad and the ugly
* A penny saved is 1.39 cents earned, if you consider income tax * The box said 'Requires Windows 95 or better'. * Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue. * I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code * Hand over the calculator, friends don't let friends derive drunk * In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows? * Roses are #FF0000, Violets are #0000FF, All my base belongs to you * I'm not anti-social I'm just not user friendly * If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0 * There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't
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